Tangled in Abuse

One of my daughter’s favorite movies is Tangled. Every time Mother Gothel sings Brad goes off on how emotionally abusive she is.

Mother Gothel:
You want to go outside? Why, Rapunzel!
Look at you, as fragile as a flower
Still a little sapling, just a sprout
You know why we stay up in this tower

Rapunzel:
I know but...

Mother Gothel:
That's right, to keep you safe and sound, dear
Guess I always knew this day was coming
Knew that soon you'd want to leave the nest
Soon, but not yet

Rapunzel:
But --

Mother Gothel:
Shh!
Trust me, pet
Mother knows best
Mother knows best
Listen to your mother
It's a scary world out there
Mother knows best
One way or another
Something will go wrong, I swear
Ruffians, thugs
Poison ivy, quicksand
Cannibals and snakes
The plague

Rapunzel:
No!

Mother Gothel:
Yes!

Rapunzel:
But --

Mother Gothel:
Also large bugs
Men with pointy teeth, and
Stop, no more, you'll just upset me
Mother's right here
Mother will protect you
Darling, here's what I suggest
Skip the drama
Stay with mama
Mama knows best
Mother knows best
Take it from your mumsy
On your own, you won't survive
Sloppy, underdressed
Immature, clumsy
Please, they'll eat you up alive
Gullible, naÎve
Positively grubby
Ditzy and a bit, well, hmm vague
Plus, I believe
Gettin' kinda chubby
I'm just saying 'cause I wuv you
Mother understands
Mother's here to help you
All I have is one request
Rapunzel?

Rapunzel:
Yes?

Mother Gothel:
Don't ever ask to leave this tower again.

Rapunzel:
Yes, Mother.

Mother Gothel:
I love you very much, dear.

Rapunzel:
I love you more.

Mother Gothel:
I love you most.
Don't forget it
You'll regret it
Mother knows BEST!

Then after Rapunzel leaves: “[after leaving her tower; happily] I can't believe I did this! [Nervously] I can't believe I did this. [excitedly squealing] I can't believe I did this! [nervous laughter] ...Mother would be so furious. Well, that's okay! I mean, what she doesn't know won't kill her, right? [rocking back and forth] Oh my gosh... This would kill her! [running] This is so fun! [puts head against a tree] ...I am a horrible daughter. I'm going back. [cartwheeling] I am NEVER going back! Woo-hoo! [face down in the grass] I am a despicable human being! [swinging around a tree] Woo-hoo! Best! Day! Ever!”

Yep, I’ve been there. I remember when I moved out going through that “I’m Moving Out!!!!” to “I can’t do it because it will hurt them!” back to “I am doing it for me!”

It is interesting how differently my husband sees abuse now. 8 years ago, he was naive! So very much so. He didn’t really get it. Now, every time we watch Tangled, or listen to it in the car while Em watches it, he gets fired up with Mother Gothel sings! I find it rather amusing! It the little things that people say to be controlling that make the most damage.