Questions and Answers that I have been asked:
1. Did I plan each time I would cut or would it just happen?
It usually happened when I was mad, angry or frustrated. It wasn’t planned. A few times it was premeditated as a way to deal with emotional pain. Once I didn’t even realize what I was doing.
2. How much did I think about it?
All the time. It is very addictive. Once you do it and see, wow that helped me feel better, even if that only lasted a little while, it helped and you want to do it again! I would sometimes go months without cutting, but it was on my mind a lot. Even over 10 years after I had stopped cutting, while dealing with other emotional pain, the yearning to cut was there!
3. Did I ever want to do other things other than cut?
A few times I thought about other things (burning) but I never really wanted to try them.
4. What did I use to cut?
Anything sharp! The first time, scissors. After that, I used a rotary blade from our paper cutter. I discovered it on accident, it was a new blade and it cut my finger as I was putting it on. I would take it off the paper cutter and use it. Once I also used a kitchen knife.
5. Where you trying to commit suicide?
No. Even though at other times I was "suicidal", that was never my intent when I was cutting.
6. What made you quit?
I moved out of the abusive/ negative environment. It didn't stop the craving to cut, but it made it easier not to.